With Snapchat being one of the most popular social media apps among tweens and teens, many parents of 12 year olds are looking for ways to make sure their child’s experience is safe and positive. While no platform is completely without risk, there are steps parents can take to lock down settings, monitor activity, have open conversations and help educate their child on using Snapchat responsibly.
Set Up a Private Account
The first step is making sure your child’s Snapchat account is set to private. This means only friends they’ve approved can view their snaps or chat with them. Here’s how to set up a private account:
- Open the Snapchat app and tap your profile icon in the top left corner
- Tap the settings gear icon in the top right corner
- Under the “Who Can” section, make sure each setting is switched to “My Friends” instead of “Everyone”
- This will limit snap visibility, story visibility, see your location and contact you to only approved friends
Setting the account to private is crucial to controlling who can interact with your child. Explain to them the importance of only accepting friend requests from people they know in real life, to prevent strangers from accessing their account.
Restrict Story Visibility Further
Even with a private account, your child’s Snapchat Story can be viewed by all of their approved friends. You may want to limit it even further by using Custom Story settings:
- After making sure Story Visibility is set to “My Friends”, tap the setting again
- Change it from “My Friends” to “Custom”
- Tap “Custom” and select only the specific friends you want to view the Story
- This lets you restrict it to just siblings, cousins or very close friends, for example
Using Custom Story gives you full control over who’s viewing. Just explain to your child that this helps keep their account extra secure.
Disable Quick Add Feature
Snapchat’s Quick Add feature lets users quickly find friends by syncing their phone’s contacts. This opens up the risk of strangers easily adding your child if their number gets shared publicly. Here’s how to turn off Quick Add:
- Go to your Snapchat profile and tap the Settings gear icon
- Scroll down and tap “Quick Add”
- Toggle the switch off so Quick Add is disabled
Double check that Quick Add is now disabled for your child’s account. This removes the option for outsiders to quickly find and add them if their contact info spreads.
Enable Ghost Mode
Ghost Mode hides your child’s location from everyone on Snapchat. This adds important privacy protection:
- Go to Settings > See My Location
- Tap “Ghost Mode”
- Toggle Ghost Mode on
Location data won’t be attached to snaps nor visible on the Snap Map with this enabled. Your child’s location will stay completely anonymous for full privacy.
Disable Snap Map Location Sharing
Speaking of location, the Snap Map lets friends see each other’s locations on a map in real time. It’s better to keep this disabled:
- Go to Settings > See My Location
- Tap “Snap Map”
- Select “Ghost Mode” to disable location sharing
Never let your tween broadcast their location, as it can make them vulnerable to stalkers. Explain why it’s dangerous and make sure Snap Map stays disabled.
Enable Travel Mode
When your child travels or goes on trips, they can use Travel Mode to hide their location entirely from Snapchat:
- Go to Settings > See My Location
- Tap “Travel Mode”
- Input a date range for the trip
This will prevent their location from updating during the specified timeframe. It’s great for vacations, camps or any time away to maintain complete privacy.
Set Screenshot Alerts
While snaps disappear, friends can still take screenshots of them. Turn on alerts so your child will be notified if anyone screenshots their content:
- Go to Settings
- Tap “Screenshots”
- Toggle “Screenshot Alerts” on
This helps make kids more aware of who may be saving their snaps. Let them know that if someone screenshots inappropriate images, they should block that person immediately.
Manage Friend List
Check that your tween’s friend list frequently contains only close friends that you know. This helps prevent strangers from accessing their account. To manage friends:
- Tap your profile icon
- Tap the Settings gear icon
- Tap “My Friends”
- Review the list and have your child remove anyone suspicious or unfamiliar
Stress the importance of only accepting requests from friends they actually know and see in person. Monitor their friend list periodically to make sure no strangers have been added.
Block Inappropriate Friends
If certain friends are posting inappropriate content or harassing your child, block them right away:
- Tap your profile icon
- Tap the Settings gear icon
- Tap “Blocked Accounts”
- Tap “Add” and search for the account to block
Take screenshots as evidence in case you need to report the account later. Make sure your child knows to come to you if they have any uncomfortable interactions.
Turn On Restricted Mode
Enabling Restricted Mode helps limit exposure to inappropriate content:
- Go to Settings
- Scroll down and tap “Restricted Mode”
- Toggle Restricted Mode on
This uses automated filters to hide snaps and stories that may contain unsafe content. While not perfect, it does provide another layer of protection for your child’s eyes.
Disable Discovery Feature
The Discover tab shows content from Snapchat publishers which may include mature themes. Disable it:
- Tap your profile icon
- Tap the settings gear icon
- Scroll down and tap “Discover”
- Toggle off Discover to disable it
Removing the Discover tab eliminates the risk of your child coming across inappropriate content from random creators.
Set Privacy Controls on Memories
Memories contain your child’s saved snaps, stories and imported photos. Tighten up who can view them:
- Tap your profile icon
- Tap the settings gear icon
- Scroll down and tap “My Memories”
- Toggle “Save to Memories” to Off if you want to disable auto-saving
- Tap “View My Memories” and set viewing permissions to “My Friends” or “Custom” to limit access
Controlling memories prevents embarrassing pics or videos from being accessed if their account is compromised. It also prevents them from being saved if you disable auto-saving.
Have Regular Conversations
No amount of parental controls replace the need for open, honest communication about technology use. Sit down with your tween frequently to establish guidelines like:
- Only share content they’d be comfortable you seeing
- Never communicate with strangers or accept their friend requests
- Be kind in their communications and avoid drama
- Do not send or ask for inappropriate pictures
- Block friends who make them uncomfortable without hesitating
- Always let you know if they have concerns about safety
Keeping the lines of communication open builds trust and sets clear expectations for responsible use.
Set Daily Time Limits
Snapchat can be tough to put down. Use your device’s parental controls to enforce daily time limits:
- iPhone – Use Screen Time settings to limit daily Snapchat access
- Android – Use the Family Link app to set up time limits and monitor use
- Windows Phone – Use built-in controls to restrict social media time allowances per day
Agree on reasonable time limits together and enforce them consistently. This teaches healthy screen time habits.
Link Accounts
Link your Snapchat account to your child’s to monitor their activity:
- On your child’s device, go to their Snapchat profile
- Tap the Settings gear icon
- Tap “Add Friends”
- Tap “Add by Username” and enter your username
- On your own device, accept their friend request
This lets you check in on their shared Stories, scores, Bitmoji avatars and more. Just explain you’re doing occasional check-ins to make sure they’re staying safe.
Explore Other Parental Controls
Some parental control services also allow you to monitor Snapchat use across devices. Options include:
- Qustodio – View messages, pics, Stories and location. Block content and limit use.
- Bark – Filters concerning content and alerts parents of potential issues.
- Boomerang – Tracks screen time and blocks use during set timeframes like bedtime.
Third party controls give you broader oversight, but do require subscription fees. Evaluate if one may be right for your family’s needs.
Avoid Checking Their Phone Behind Their Back
It may be tempting to sneak onto your kid’s phone and covertly check their Snapchat, but this erodes trust. Have open conversations about accountability instead. Explain that since you pay for the phone, you have the right to check in if needed. Building mutual trust and giving space leads to more responsible use long-term.
Set a Good Example
Tweens mimic what they see. If you’re glued to your phone, they’ll think that behaviour is normal. Maintain good habits like:
- Putting your phone away during family time
- Not using phones at the dinner table
- Having shared charging stations instead of nightstands
- Demonstrating positive online etiquette in your own sharing
Model the behavioyou want to see from your kids. Show them good digital citizenship in real life and on social media.
Reassure Them They Can Come to You
The most important thing is ensuring your child knows they can come to you about anything that happens online. Even if they make a mistake like sexting or posting something embarrassing, let them know you are on their side and will help them through it. Have an open door policy around technology use, with no fear of punishment if they get into trouble and speak with you first. This builds the trust essential for navigating the digital world.
Conclusion
While no platform provides perfect safety, parents can take proactive steps to lock down settings, monitor use and have open conversations to maximize a child’s wellbeing on Snapchat. Building mutual trust and being involved go further than trying to simply block access. Snapchat can be a fun way for kids to socialize as long as parents lay the groundwork for responsible use.